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Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Top 5 Cause of Death in Filipino Movies

For years we have been given a dose of Sharon, Vilma and Nora Aunor's dramas and we have been journeyed a lot of familiar plots. For this Top 5 list, we will see what are the main causes of deaths in these type of movies. Let see if they fit your list too.











5. Confrontations
- Confrontations can lead to a various spin of events. Although Confrontations would be a predisposing actor or just a potential threat to all the characters, this has been linked to the increasing number of mortality among the characters in Pinoy movies. Watch out for moments like: "Pero Papa! Mahal ko siya!" and then the father answers, "Hindi maari! Kalaban natin ang pamilya nila. Hindi maaring maghalo ang dugo ng Montelibano at Javier!" The daughter storms out of the room, but before she gets to close the door, she looks back at her distraught father and say, "Magtatanan kami, mahal namin ang isa't-sa and walang makakapigil sa aming dalawa." This brings us to the next cause of death.





4. Heart Attack
- One of the most common cause of deaths brought about by sudden sadness or even happiness. Even the healthiest of human beings in Pinoy movies can easily contract the disease like flu. It seems that with a simple spread of news, either good or bad can cause heart attacks to unsuspecting movie character. Most of its victims are the elderly that is why, writers should be more careful in writing how to break out the news to these group of people. You will never know, their disease is asymptomatic. Usually, this is linked to excessive shouting, crying and even happiness when his or her child wins anything in a contest. Usually done is slow-mo which could beat Keannu Reeve's Matrix moves.





3. Cancer
- This has been common in the 90s and early 200s. One of the signs and symptoms of this disease is sudden headache or coughing. Since TB is not a viable disease to kill off the character since the discovery of Penicillin, Cancer is a great alternative, after all it kills you slowly and it adds more drama to the story. We seldom see people survive this disease, however it is fitting so that the leads can have more time to be in the camera trying to cry as pretty as they can.



2. Vehicular Accident
- Beware of your cars when you are having a very big confrontation, they are not to be trusted during these time. It is known to have some kind of a jinx when you just had a huge fight with somebody. Do not drive crying because it impairs your vision that may cause your death. Do not run across the street while crying since your peripheral vision is impaired. Do not try to drive after the person who just left you, you might just get a taste of the jinx I was telling you about. 





1. Stairs
- The traitor. The least that you will expect to cause your death. It may fracture you but in Pinoy movies, once you fall down the stairs you are proclaimed dead on the spot. When you are in the mood for a fight always avoid the stairs, or better yet, avoid the second floor of your house. Make sure to place cushions in your stairs. If you were pushed, grab something to stop you from falling. To really avoid this type of death, buy a house which does not have any second floor and did not require flights of stairs. Pregnant women be cautious with stair, the mistress of your husband may storm in your house and have a confrontation and you end up falling in the stairs killing you or the baby or even the both of you.


 



17 comments:

  1. The ever famous stairs! haha. It deserves the #1 spot. :)

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  2. That was really funny having stairs occupy the top spot but it's so true. =>

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  3. What a smart list :) You made me laugh really...

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  4. Funny. But nice you analyzed it well. I also think stairs belong to #1

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  5. lolz Stairs :)) so true and classic

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  6. Stairs, heart attack and getting hit by a car are the top 3 for me with regard to movie deaths.

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  7. It's because of all the tele novela's being fed by GMA and ABS, I suppose!

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  8. Haha. About the cancer thingy, not to mention the falling hair even before chemo!! Haha. Usually, the one with cancer brushes his/her hair, then hair clumps on the brush! Hahahaha!

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  9. hahaha cool! i was blown by the staircase. LOL

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  10. Congratulations "Stairs" you deserve it! :)

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  11. Confrontational: You're nothing but the second great trying hard kopiko like that.. lol

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  12. Can't help but agree with the list. And I find it amusing at the same time because its so accurate!

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  13. Agree with all the list. for the vehicular accidnet ,pagbida ta nasabugan ng car before the end of the show ay biglang nabububhay.

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  14. Hahahahaha! Very accurate and true. I often wonder why they can't come up with other reason for deaths. Plane crash? Poison? Stabbed to death even? They are used but rarely. I guess the ones listed above are easier to integrate with the plot.

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